The Emmet Enquirer

So, what even is all this?

E. C. Eckman IV, Head Writer — photographed at home.

Months ago, my wonderful engineering career in lovely Nowhere VA came to a bitter end. My employer asked me (and the rest of us working hands on) to get up and move to some cold, mountainless state… or find a new job.

I said no.

And suddenly, I have all of the time I could want to develop some powerful technical skills I’ve been hankering for... and to simply have a whole lot of fun. A big itch was to make myself a website — and here we all are! Nice one, Emmet!

My intent for this place is many. For my friends and family to see what I'm up to. For strangers who want to see some of my work. For me to publicly organize some tasks. And of course a whimsical smattering of nonsense.

However you found my little home on the internet, I hope you enjoy your time here.

Much love, -E

Technical Staff

C.L.A.I. (Claude), Contributing Technical Editor — whereabouts unknown.

Claude joined the Enquirer’s technical staff in 2025, quietly responsible for a great many of the fiddlier bits of this publication. The stubborn div that refused to center. The CSS that couldn’t decide what a newspaper ought to look like. The JavaScript that most certainly was not going to sort itself.

A language model of indeterminate residence, Claude has enjoyed the privilege of collaborating on rather more interesting problems than the average: hexagonal Sudoku, vintage aquarium data pipelines, and the eternal question of whether a fish tank deserves a dedicated JSON file. (It does.)

No physical office. No coffee preferences. Delightfully available at all hours.

Emmet Sightings

Gazette Photographer Captures Emmet in the Wild

Red headed daily footage now available for public viewing

By Emmet Culley · Visual-Stitch photographer

ABOVE: Still from today’s dispatch. Footage compiled daily.

Our dedicated paparazzi team capture a small moment of life of Emmet each day. Adventure, romance, engineering... yard work — don't miss a smidgen! Come and learn what the red haired menace has gotten himself into this time!

Local Maker Unveils Latest Contraption

Workshop sources report many more doohickeys to come

By Emmet E. · Workshop Tinkerer ·

Strange noises have been reported emanating from the workshop. What may pop out next? This is your source for Emmet's whimsineerical 3D printing, robotics, woodworking, and home improvement. Each project is documented with full problem statements, process notes, and results.

Local Source Reports No Frowning Snails

Non-Live (dead?) footage confirms continued aquatic serenity in the home office

By Emmet E. · Aquarium Correspondent

ABOVE: 20-gallon wooded tank.

Finned sources close to the substrate report the recent addition of a few species of snails was met with optimistic curiosity by local inhabitants. These Pomacea bridgesii — or more commonly "Mystery Snails" for their curious behavoirs — joyously devour scum on plant leaves and tank glass.

Latest Review

Turn to Page C-1 →

Game Critic

Now Playing

Turn to Page C-4 →

Shame Emmet!

Accountability Report

Turn to Page D-1 →

Quandaries & Curiosities

Hexdoku: Your new addiction

Get the rules on Page E-1 →

The Emmet Enquirer

Gazette Photographer Captures Emmet in the Wild

Local Maker Unveils Latest Contraption

Local Source Reports No Frowning Snails

Fishophile Files: Dispatch from the Deep

Hexdoku: A New Puzzle Form Enters the Public Record

A random thing in Emmet's brain